How to avoid being possessive

being possessive

Sometimes, couples end up with suffocating relationships in which they can not take a step without the approval of each other.
The arguments, jealousy, and distrust are consequences of a possessive relation and such relationship eventually end up badly. Therefore, if in your earlier relationships, you have been a being possessive person.
It is important that you learn to stop being one, in order to enjoy love with a healthy and trustworthy relationship.

In this article, we’ll tell you how to avoid being possessive with simple practices that you can carry out progressively.

Steps to follow:

Root cause :

Possessive attitudes develope from some basic element:

Lack of self-confidence, Low self-esteem, and selfishness can develop negative thoughts and doubts in the mind. Possessive people, every time they are not with their partner, doubt their love, their fidelity, and their words.

The origin is that they do not love themselves and, then, how is their partner going to love them?

Here, are some steps which you should follow to stop being possessive:

 So the first step to stop being possessive is :
  • Learn to love yourself, respect yourself.
  • Understand that a couple is the union of two independent people who decide to live together to be happier.

Another basic and fundamental point to be able to avoid falling into the error of being possessive is :
  • Trust your partner. Although this seems like a difficult task, it is essential in order to have a healthy partner.
  • Trust in it. Otherwise, the relationship will only be discussions, prohibitions and everything but not happiness.
  • It is essential that you respect your partner’s personality, their decisions, their friendships and their desires.
  • Telling you who you can, where you can go out, or how you can go dressed is a symptom of distrust and possession that you must eradicate from now on.

Respect for the other is basic. So that your relationship goes well and lasts over time.

Learn to forget, forgive and overcome the things that happened in the past :

  • If you have a hard time being calm every time you go out the door, analyze what is the source of this discomfort.
  • Many times, we project past feelings in our new relationships that have nothing to do with the current situation.
  • That is a serious mistake because we must learn to forget, forgive and overcome the things that happened in the past.
  • A relationship of fears, doubts, and suspicions does not lead to a good port and the only thing that awaits you at the end of the road is suffering.

To stop being possessive you have to think one thing:
  • Your partner is with you because he/she wants to be with you.
  • It should always be clear that a couple is a union of two people who decide to be together, two people who have their lives, their friends, and their dreams. And that must be respected.
  • Everyone needs their piece of individuality, their moment just for him, his/her times with his/her friends. So do not try to intrude here because, in the end, you will feel overwhelmed.
  • It is vital that you respect your space, your independence, and your life and let him/her live as s/he wants.

Communication is important to improve your relationship and leave aside your most possessive part.


  • Communicating means talking, not arguing. So, if you feel uncomfortable with something, sit down and talk to your partner calmly, respecting the turn of the word. And, above all, not raising the tone of voice.
  • During these conversations, it is difficult to control the nerves. But it is essential that you try so that the communication is effective and you end up more united. Instead of angry.
  • Keep in mind that talking is understood by people. Any detail that may have bothered you, you can explain it to her. so that she understands it and gives you her point of view.
  • In this way, you will know each other better. You will respect yourself more and you will get a healthy relationship.


6 And, above all, if you are possessive because:

  • -You have not been able to forgive your partner
    -Because they hurt you in the past.
  • Sincerely, we recommend that it is not yet time to start a new relationship.
  • Give yourself time, heal your wounds and when you are ready you can start from scratch.
  • To have a partner again without having overcome the pains of another relationship. It can be a serious error that will only bring you more suffering.

So take care of yourself. Ready to share your life with another person but first learn to be well alone.